Blogus Interruptus…
Or, to be more aeronautically accurate…
(For the uninitiated…and boy should you consider yourselves fortunate…snorkel backstory here)
So, after finally achieving piece of mind with the snorkel I lost, found, got confiscated, got repatriated, got lost by the airline, was found in NYC, got destroyed on the North Shore of Oahu which caused me to endure many months of psychotherapy, I was finally in the proper state of mind to be able to purchase a new snorkel and I used it last year on Maui.
However at the end of my trip I left the snorkel alone in the rental car which was subsequently broken into and all my belongings, including the snorkel, were stolen. Now I was pissed. It’s one thing to go through all I went through with my first ever snorkel but to have the second one stolen so soon after I bought it? That’s annoying.
I filed a report with the police but never heard anything. I resigned myself to the notion that I’d have to buy yet another snorkel but then I discovered that the US Government knew where my snorkel was all along and didn’t tell me. I found this out purely by accident while reading through the latest of the Wikileaks State Department cable releases. *
So I’m off to Dubai to find my snorkel. Al Queda ain’t getting a dime out of me. ICN will not be a party to terrorism! I’ll kill whoever has it. Never get between a cable news blogger and his snorkel.
But seeing as I’m going to be spending 16 hours straight in a middle seat in Economy class flying from San Francisco to Dubai (ugh..) and flying to a spot literally halfway around the world, I might as well get some enjoyment out of it. So after I get my snorkel back in Dubai I’m headed to The Maldives where the diving is supposed to be pretty good. Hope I get to see a Hammerhead shark or two, though I doubt it since they tend to congregate at an atoll that is probably too far away by dive boat from the atoll we’re staying on.
If I can do it, I’ll be broadcasting updates from my journey on my Twitter feed.
You’re going to find it hard to believe but before the fall of 2007 I had flown just twice in the previous thirteen years.
Blogging resumes January 30th though that may not last long as I’m scheduled for jury duty January 31st.
* For the terminally clueless, no…that’s not a real Wikileaks State Department cable.
January 14, 2011 at 1:19 pm
Where in the world is Spud’s snorkel?
Comic books, action figures…. it’ll be a hit.
Unfortunately, all my money is tied up in other investments (ahem).
January 14, 2011 at 1:25 pm
I’m angling for a movie trilogy with Brad Pitt playing me. Admittedly a step down in the looks department but what can you do?
January 14, 2011 at 2:14 pm
^ I see we do not have any ego problems. This is very good for you and I wish you a safe and enjoyable trip.
January 14, 2011 at 3:44 pm
The “terminally clueless” never read very far down a paragraph let alone all the way to the end of an entry.
January 14, 2011 at 3:59 pm
The ‘terminally clueless’ only read the last paragraph, as it was just highly recommended.
January 14, 2011 at 4:10 pm
Spud, I am currently looking for work. My background is primarily in cost analysis, but I feel well equipped to be a snorkel protector.
Should I forward my resume?
January 14, 2011 at 4:30 pm
“I’m angling for a movie trilogy with Brad Pitt playing me.”
Gee Spud, wouldn’t Paul Giamatti be more your type.
January 14, 2011 at 5:04 pm
(making note to ban Fritz)
The “terminally clueless” never read very far down a paragraph let alone all the way to the end of an entry.
Apparently the terminally clueless don’t see the asterisk either!
January 14, 2011 at 5:38 pm
As long as it’s not “Brad Pitt with stupid Sting goatee”, we’re good.
January 14, 2011 at 6:23 pm
I believe Pitt had the goatee before Sting. So Sting has a “stupid Brad Pitt goatee”…
(making note to ban Joe for dissing goatees)
January 14, 2011 at 7:05 pm
Goatees are for douchebags who leave ridiculously beautiful, nice women for scary looking “actresses” with an adoption fetish. Or play the lute.
January 14, 2011 at 7:26 pm
“(making note to ban Joe for dissing goatees)”
^ At this rate you will have banned all the irregulars before you even leave.
I’m surprised none of the cable news nets have yet picked up the story of the ‘Canadian Broadcast Standards Council’ banning Dire Straits ‘Money for Nothing’ because Mark Knopfler used a gay slur ‘fa**ot’ in it’s lyrics; even though it was to mock h*m*phobes.
It would seem to be a made for cable news story. My bet it’s on a loop by tomorrow.
January 14, 2011 at 7:32 pm
Dire Straits, Canadians. Not much buzz there, mate.
January 14, 2011 at 8:12 pm
Who you callin’ ‘irregular’, Hoss?
January 14, 2011 at 8:24 pm
Irregulars? Hey! I resemble that remark!
January 14, 2011 at 8:43 pm
Goatees are for douchebags
I have a goatee! Care to revise you bannable statement?
At this rate you will have banned all the irregulars before you even leave
It is on my to do list…
January 14, 2011 at 8:46 pm
I’m surprised none of the cable news nets have yet picked up the story of the ‘Canadian Broadcast Standards Council’ banning Dire Straits ‘Money for Nothing’ because Mark Knopfler used a gay slur ‘fa**ot’ in it’s lyrics; even though it was to mock h*m*phobes.
Song’s only 26 years old! Talk about timely…
January 14, 2011 at 8:48 pm
– Talk about timely…–
Well it is Canada, after all.
January 14, 2011 at 8:48 pm
I have a goatee! Care to revise you bannable statement?
GOATEES TOTALLY KICK A$$! Just stay away from the lute. And scary chicks.
January 14, 2011 at 9:10 pm
Seems to me that this topic should have been named “Beyond the Fringe, Part II”.
January 14, 2011 at 11:05 pm
This usually ends up being called The Thread That Makes Spud Consider Banning Everybody After He Gets Back..
January 14, 2011 at 11:16 pm
MSNBC or The Weather Channel should run “Snorkel Search” cartoons on weekends. About a giant goatee’d potato head in search of its fleeing snorkel.
January 14, 2011 at 11:18 pm
Call it ”Kiss My Tube”.
January 14, 2011 at 11:34 pm
^ Yep..that’s pretty much how it starts..
January 14, 2011 at 11:47 pm
As long as I Respect the Goatee, I feel pretty safe.
January 15, 2011 at 9:31 am
You should not respect the Goatee…you should fear the Goatee!
January 15, 2011 at 7:08 pm
Fear and loathing? Gotcha.
January 16, 2011 at 11:13 am
No fear here.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/earthpicturegalleries/8260716/Animal-pictures-of-the-week-14-January-2011.html
January 17, 2011 at 11:48 am
You just reminded me that if the jet crashes over the arctic, I have to worry about Polar Bears…
January 17, 2011 at 4:22 pm
^ Unless said polar bear is wearing your snorkel…
January 19, 2011 at 9:47 am
It’s what all the cool ones are wearing.
January 20, 2011 at 9:58 pm
What does a broad have to do to get a drink around here?
January 21, 2011 at 10:53 am
The calla lilies are in bloom again.
January 21, 2011 at 7:26 pm
– Keithus Interruptus. –
http://www.mediaite.com/tv/breaking-keith-olbermann-announces-tonights-countdown-as-his-last-show/
Just trying to bring this over to a thread of less than 300.
January 21, 2011 at 8:50 pm
^ Good luck with that. Looks like everybody’s bored with it already.
January 21, 2011 at 8:59 pm
Olbermann? Name’s familiar – Wasn’t he the host of the Tonight Show for half a season?
January 21, 2011 at 9:13 pm
I’m sure we’ll all remember where we were. At home, Friday night, no life.
January 21, 2011 at 10:22 pm
Hey! I like being home.
January 21, 2011 at 10:23 pm
Not that there’s anything wrong with that..
January 27, 2011 at 7:49 pm
It’s so lonely around here.